Is getting married right for you? What do you need to know before you get married? Ask yourself:
5. Why are you getting married?
Be honest about your engagement. Do you just feel like you should be married? Why do you feel that way? Make sure you aren’t using your marriage to avoid or escape something.
4. Did you plan for marriage or a wedding?
Flowers and cakes are fun and all but there's more to your relationship than that. Your wedding is one day - your marriage is a lifetime. Being married isn’t the goal – anyone could get married. Being happily married is much more challenging. What’s your next 50 years of your life going to look like?
Come to an understanding with your partner about how you'll handle children, money, careers, family, retirement, etc.
3. Do you know and trust your partner?
The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour. What was your partner like in previous relationships? How do they treat you? What have you and your partner learnt about marriage from your parents?
2. What’s the emotional cost of your relationship?
If you have to give up your friends or family, then the cost is too high. If it doesn’t work out, are you going to be emotionally hollowed out? It’s better to be healthy and alone than to be sick in a relationship.
1. Have you set your needs and expectations?
It's healthy to have goals in your relationship. Express your needs and expectations now, not when you're already married.
What are your deal breakers? What are your partner's?
These are all difficult questions with no easy answers.
Jak Nguyen is a Melbourne Marriage Celebrant with over a decade of experience in the wedding industry. Connect on Facebook and hit that 'Like' button!
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